


It has been always you

by stelaLTMSYF



Category: Teenage Bounty Hunters, stepril
Genre: Christian Character, F/F, Girlfriends - Freeform, Girls Kissing, girlxgirl, non english writer, stepril - Freeform, teenage bounty hunters - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:55:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26144476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stelaLTMSYF/pseuds/stelaLTMSYF
Summary: April Stevens has been always a fighter against the world. Sometimes afraid of it, sometimes not. Even when she fight against it, but, will she fight back when it comes of the love of her life?Will for the first time fight for something she wants or will let the world she live in take the love of her live away?(THis is an Stepril one shot written by a non-english speaker so be gentle, please)
Relationships: April Stevens/Sterling Wesley, Sterling Wesley/April Stevens, Sterling/April, april/sterling
Comments: 5
Kudos: 84





	It has been always you

**Author's Note:**

> (THis is an Stepril one shot written by a non-english speaker so be gentle, please)

Love is hard  
Love is difficult.  
Love is un predictible.  
Love is good  
Love is bad.  
Never in my life i felt something like this before. Never in my life i would have imagine i would finally fall in love and that love would be a woman.  
Yes, a woman.  
I always knew i was different. I always knew my heart was not "in the right place". Because, let's face it, it's not 'normal' that you always have this huge crush that my others girl friends said that they had for boys, for girls. Always girls, girls and only girls. So when it came to the time... i knew i was gay, that i was lesbian. I knew i had to accept it and if i was, it was for a reason. Because God can't be wrong. He knows what he does. So if he made me gay, he made me lesbian, it was because there was a reason behind that.  
And i guess that reason had finally a name: Sterling Wesley.  
Yes, my best friend till fifth grade... and my only love since the moment she kissed me. Since the moment she became my first kiss. Who would have told that my first kiss would have been with a woman, with my best friend...?  
The thing is that even God knows i felt for her hard, the world would not let me, let us, live in peace. Live what we felt that was right. It was imposible. Because even when we think our actions are what God tell us is the right thing, maybe what we are earing is the devil himself. And i knew because of that, that our love was imposible. More since daddy came back from prision.  
Never think big, because sometimes, we can fall in disgrace in our own heaven.  
And for a time, i tried everything. I tried to be the old April. I tried to close my heart to her, i tried to hate her with all my heart. I tried to feel the same thing i felt for years. But, like i said, i tried because even when i hated when i heard her and Luke came back together; even when her sister keep being this son of a devil, the only thing i could felt about her, was love. The only thought about her that i had, was how much i wanted her back, how i wanted to be Luke to hold her hand and how bad i wanted for us, to live in a place where i could kiss her and not feel afraid of what i was.  
And is that in our annual meeting for the election of the "Young representations of God in earth", everything became like a dream. All the community was there, since being choosen was like choosen our next Republican candidate and partner, the best of the best. Weird concept, but it was what it was.  
My parents where there, the headmaster of the school, our priest, Luke and Sterling, her parents. Everybody, literally.  
"Welcome to our new election of Young representation of God in earth" started talking Ellen "Today is a huge day, because finally, we have our new candidate and partner finally chosen" everybody started clapping, everyone except me.  
Because I couldn’t keep my eyes from Sterling and Luke. It was so stupid. Because they were there, sitting side by side. Nothing more…. Except their hands were hold together. It was stupid, because at the end, they were only doing what a couple does: hold hand. But for some reason, that day… I was more jealous than even.  
Yep, I was jealous. So jealous and I had been feeling like that for days now. The reason? I don’t know. It was like this days, the love I was feeling for her was stronger than ever. It was stupid.  
“So. This year, the couple that represents the best from our Lord, praise him is… Sterling Wesley and Luke Crewell” surprise, surprise… not so surprise.  
It was written since the day everybody knew that those two were together again. So that Ellen chose them was no new. The community was happy and I guess it was the ‘normal’ thing to happen, right? A White ‘hetero’ couple representing the best of our Christian community.  
God, this was so lame…  
I look at them and for a brief split of second, I feel like Sterling was looking at me. But since Luke started to walk to the front of the seats, her focus was soon put to our people. People happy for them… for her.  
“Thank you so much” Luke is the first to talk “We are so happy to represent this amazing… what it was?” Luke… like always, this stupid.  
“Like couple of God” says Sterling.  
“Yeah, couple of God” Luke laughs “I’m happy to say…”  
“that I can’t accept the award” the words of Sterling cut like a knife the air.  
Everyone started to look at them, speaking, asking why something that some will kill for, was suddenly rejected. Nobody has done that before. Why Sterling now? I look at her, she put her eyes on me for a moment, before continues talking.  
“I can’t accept it… because I don’t represent this award” even Luke looks at her, only to smile and step away “and I wanted to choose this moment for everybody to know so then, nobody can talk shit behind my back”  
I can’t help but laughing. It was her effect on me. I laugh with that, while everyone started talking like it was a offense to God. I look at the Wesleys, her parents were… normal? Like… something they knew she was going to do? Even Blair was like happy.  
What was happening?  
“Sterling, dear” Ellen walks to her “What’s happening”  
Sterling breaths for a moments before continuing.  
“The thing is… I can’t represent what I’m not. I can’t represent the true spirit of a couple from God when… Luke and I not longer a couple” for a moment, I tried not to scream. I look away, trying to calm myself.  
I don’t know what I was thinking… but… anyway.  
“We broke up” Luke says.  
“Yes, because I can’t be with someone I can’t love” my attention goes to Sterling as fast I hear her words “because Gods know how much I love this person” says in reference to Luke “But the last few weeks… my heart hasn’t been in order” I try to breath, to calm the heartbeats of my heart that goes as fast as the world spins “Because I felt in love with someone…” her eyes looks at me in that moment, at me, before going back to the rest of the community “Someone who I never knew I would love as I do. A person that show me that love is not taught, is chosen, is taken by surprise… that show me that love is something unexpected and if you want to truly feel what love is, you have to live it. A definition of love that I couldn’t find with a men, because even I love Luke… and loved it too much. But because I can choose between women and men… I felt all those things with the other side… I felt in love with a different person” I can’t breath in that moment “And that person is a girl”  
Everything turns quiet for a moment. Nobody speaks, nobody talks for a second before I look at the Wesleys and everybody started talking. My attention was on the Wesleys then because… they knew? They knew. Sterling told them she would do that and they knew what was going to happen and they were… ok with it… they were… ok like so many people in our community.  
Because, even I couldn’t believe it, people were ok with it.  
“And she chose the moment of the award to come out? Well, another lesbian out”  
“Well, at least looks like Luke knew”  
“Who cares? My son and her girlfriend could have win”  
I couldn’t believe it, but those were their comments. Like… she said, people would support and love us unconditionally. She was right.  
“Urgh. Another fag” well, everyone except my father, of course.  
My heart started beating fast.  
I look at her while the rest of the people only talked about it. Sterling was looking at me also. She smiles, turns back at Luke that gives her a hug and suddenly, I see her running away to the door.  
I needed to talk to her.  
I wanted to talk to her.  
And I run to her while my father was commenting the news with my mother.  
“Sterling” I catch her outside.  
Or, better said, she catches me when I see she was standing outside, facing the door.  
“I knew you could come” she says with a smile in her face.  
“You knew?” I ask a little… yep, ashamed but with a smile on my face.  
“More like I hoped you would come” she replies “what do think?”  
“about what happened there?” she nods “You are crazy” it was my honest truth.  
But she smiles at me.  
“Well… call me crazy then” Sterling laughs “But I needed to do it. For me… for my heart” i look at her, bite my lip, my mind goes crazy “I couldn’t forget you. Sorry, but it’s the truth”  
“And that’s why you told everybody” and she nods “But, why? You can become a black sheep” I reply.  
“Did i? I drank in a frat party. I had sex with Luke and look at me… it was fine with me. And… for what I heard… it has been pretty ok with the community as well” well, she was right with that “Plus… I didn’t said it was you, if it’s what you are scared of”  
‘If that’s what you are scared of’ that phrase. Those words…  
“I don’t think I’m scared of that” I reply “I’m scared of… different thing”  
Sterling smiles and God, that good damn smile. I can’t take it.  
She walks to me, her hand takes mine. For a moment, I can’t help but keep my eyes, my attention, all myself on her.  
“I told you people would accept us… I’m not saying that you can come out also, but what I’m going to say is that if you choose to… Look what will happen… and that I will always… always will wait for you”  
And is like all the feelings of the world started to grown on me. I start to feel happiness in all their forms, love like never before. A sensation that was like the grace from God. It was perfect for the moment.  
“you really meant it?” I ask Sterling  
“I mean it” she nods to my question “I don’t know why, but I can’t keep you out of my mind. Every time I was with Luke, my mind was with you. In the moment we had in the arcades, in the car. Those moments where really felt happy, in love. Every time I kissed him, my mind was feeling you” her right hand goes to my face, I smile “ my mind was thinking I was kissing you… And even if I’m maybe too impulsive for saying this… I love you, April. I will always will do…”  
I couldn’t let her go away. I couldn’t let her walk away from me after those words. Because, let’s face it, it was the same thing I was feeling all this days. The same thing I felt since the moment I had to give her away.  
So… why not?  
I take the chance, I take the leap and I close the space between us. I didn’t give a shit. I wasn’t afraid of my father that was inside. I wasn’t afraid of what they could say because I already hear it. Because love wins and in this moment, was winning. So I kiss her. I kiss her with my soul and let me tell you that was the best kiss I ever had. I kiss where I felt… free. Happy again.  
Because I was kissing who was owning my heart in that moment. No more Adeles, no more moments where I was helpless, waiting for something to help me to be happy again. Because I already had what I wanted, what I needed: her. Sterling. My first kiss, my first love, my first everything.  
Will it least? I don’t know. But for now, being able to take that step, to kiss her, literally having my biggest fear a few feet away… it was I wanted, what I was ready to fight for. Because, why not, fighting for love sometimes, was what I wanted.  
“I love you too” I say to Sterling too.


End file.
